The Internet is for porn...

When I came back from school yesterday, I found my front door wide open and I got a bit scared. At the entrance were two pairs of shoes – oh yes, because in China you never get into someone’s place with your shoes on! – and I could hear people talking inside my flat... I entered, looked in the living room and saw two men from the building’s management company who seemed busy working on my tv set... Once again: WTF?!... As soon as they saw me, they apologised – they’re so polite, these Chinese! – and said they were here to repair the satellite tv receiver... Err, thank you 1/ for not letting me know about you entering my flat and 2/ for fixing something that wasn’t broken in the first place! What’s the problem with these people?!... Anyway, after ten minutes playing with the receiver they both left. I then decided to go online and guess what? My connection was not working! I was so upset: not only did they do something they hadn’t been asked to do but they also messed up my internet connection... Grrr... I called the building’s manager and had a rant on the phone. She apologised for the trouble and told me she’d send someone. Well, I thought, it might be ages until the guy turns up, so I might as well try to connect to the neighbours’ connection. And I did just that! After checking my mail, I started watching a film for sweet, sensitive men online – not porn... but oh so very gay –, when the internet guy turned up. I stopped the film and opened the door. The guy came in and asked what the problem was, so I told him. He first checked the router, he then turned to my computer and there it was: a still picture of two guys getting cosy on a sofa... I was so embarrassed! So I quickly shut the page, but then he realised it was an online film I was watching, and asked how come I was connected if the connection was down...?! Once again, I was so embarrassed and told him that I really needed the internet – yeah right, to watch gay movies, that’s urgent! – and so I connected to the neighbour’s network... Let me tell you he wasn’t impressed... But then, as if the humiliation wasn’t enough, he saw that I was using a VPN – which is a software you need to go onto Western websites in China, as they’re all blocked, except that using a VPN is illegal over here... oh dear! – he looked at me funny, as I grabbed the computer to get rid of the VPN logo on my desktop... Eventually, he fixed my connection but I’m pretty sure my name must now be down on a black list in the management office... Tower A, flat 202: dodgy guy!

Comments

[PickyMiss]

hilarious!! glad you're living it up! so i have the first line of your address... can you email me the rest, please? perhaps my postcards to china will arrive? (unlike egypt!) xx